(i just reposted this,it's not mine)
Credit: edamame@OneTVXQ.com
A letter for those who have lost and are losing faith?
But even though you’re still keeping the faith, I hope you read this anyway. XDD
—
Dong Bang Shin Ki betrayed you right? I know. I get you. I understand what you feel. We loved the same boys.We’ve seen the same things. We’ve heard the same rumors, cried about the same issues, bawled over the same stories.
I saw Changmin cry in 2008 too, and I saw how the members comforted him.
I’ve seen them cry in the Budoukan. I’ve seen them bow after every concert. I’ve seen them hug after receiving every award.
I’ve heard Jaejoong’s words last MAMA Awards. I’ve seen their messages. I’ve heard them say ‘Cassiopeia Saranghe’ as many times as you did.
I know that Yunho said TVXQ would not disband.
I’ve cried as much as the next person and I’ve said ‘Always Keep the Faith’ endlessly too.
I get you. I get you.
I know how it feels like to wake up in the morning, opening your computer and finding yourself shaking for news. I know how it feels like to be so sad that you want to puke. I know how it feels like to wait for something which seems like it’ll never come
I’ve asked the same questions. Why? When? How?
I’ve pictured the same ‘coulds’ and ‘what ifs’. I’ve wished the same wishes.
I’ve distracted myself with the same pictures, songs and videos.
And I’ve been hurt too. Just like everyone else.
Those years together, they’ve thrown it away for some fucking shit you don’t even understand. They betrayed you big time, right?
They could’ve done things to solve the problems. They could’ve stuck together. But they didn’t. They did their own thing without even leaving you a notice…or giving you a reason why.
And one day, you just realize, Hey, the boys I watched over for years, where have they gone?
You think, Are they still the same?
And you wonder if this is all still worth it.
You try to Keep the Faith but then you start thinking, they’re messing with me. They think I’m a fool for still believing some big ass miracle shit could happen. But you struggle anyway because you trust them.
And it hurts you a lot, you quit and you decide to hurt them too.
It’s only fair I guess. I mean, who are they to you? Who are you to them? You don’t even know them. They have no right to make you suffer. They’re probably playing with you and your feelings while they milk some cash and get even more famous.
But have you ever wondered how it feels to be them?
Have you ever wondered how it feels like to stand in front of people and smile like a fool even though deep inside you’re hurting?
Have you ever wondered how it feels like to have stood at a huge stage, crying with fans?
Have you wondered…how it feels like looking back at that, remembering it; how it used to be so beautiful and realizing how painful it is now? How it’s like feeling everything all over again without the other four behind you?
Have you ever wondered how it feels like to reach number one in the Oricon charts and not be able to celebrate with the family who made it possible? How it feels like to reach the top and not have anyone else?
Has it ever occurred to you how it feels like to hear news about your band breaking up? How it feels like to see someone cry because of you? How it feels like to see your fans, wearing your color, shouting your names, supporting you? How it feels to witness that and not be able to even say thank you?
Can you imagine how it feels like to lose your brothers? How it feels like to not wake up to the same scene you’ve been waking up to for the last 7 years?
Have you wondered how it feels like, staring at another member while they’re on a different path? How it feels like to see them smiling like there’s nothing wrong?
Have you wondered how it feels like to walk a path for more than six years with people you love, only to find them, one day, taking a different road…without you?
I wonder. Do you?
Do you still?
Do you still remember how you used to cry for them them? Do you remember the pain?
Think about it, you hate them so much because of what they’ve done to you, but have you ever thought that you’re just a spec in all this? What you feel is just a small prick compared to theirs.
You and your reasons.
Have you ever thought what it’s like to be in the middle? They’re probably suffering ten times more than you did. But did they hate you? Did they hate you for leaving? No. In fact, they’re doing their best to reach you, to let their voices come to you.
So say what you want. Leave and come back as you please. Shun them. Judge them as much as you like. Because YES, you can always come back. These boys are kind enough to endure THIS.
Go. Fleet. Because I know this is painful for you and your pain has turned into anger. After all it’s fair for you. The five have made their choices, and you will make yours. But remember…just remember.
The boys you said cold words to.
The boys you judged.
They will still sing for you, no matter how far you’ve walked away.
Ask yourself again,
Who are they to you?
They are TVXQ.
Who are you to them?
You are Cassiopeia.
You don’t even know them? Really? Oh, you know
. You know them because you are Cassiopeia and they are DBSK.
And you also know, deep down in there,
that you’ll never lose them.
—
Credit: edamame@OneTVXQ.com
